Sunday, November 20, 2005
Head above water
I find myself having more good days than bad lately, and it's kind of nice. We're nowhere near getting ahead yet, but we're catching up. I had to do another all day at the doctor's day on Thursday. I saw my Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner to get my meds renewed. My shrink who is just chomping at the bit to get me to address my parental issues. The dentist to get my chipped front tooth fixed, and the nutritionist to start myself on the high road to avoiding Type 2 diabetes.
Yes, I am officially insulin resistant. I have given up Coca Cola. *cue the dirge* In the grand scheme of things, it's not as awful as I had originally projected. It's more of an issue of dealing with the fact that this particular choice has been taken from me. I think that's what bothered me the most. BUT, in the long run it's just soda pop. I'm drinking Coke Zero and Diet Mountain Dew and getting on with my life. The nutritionist told me that "we" need to jump start my metabolism. Apparently if you don't eat something for breakfast and lunch and don't excersize you metabolism pretty much shuts down. Who knew. So I've been instructed to eat either a scrabled egg wrap, or yogurt and grape nuts, or cereal for breakfast and walk for 15 minutes a day. AND I'm supposed to get back into the habit of taking my suplements. *mental note: dig those out of the pile of cr*p on my desk and put them next to my meds*
We switched dentists. We had been going to Dr. R. for years but when I called a couple weeks ago to schedule an appointment to get my chipped tooth fixed, they refused to schedule it. I don't have insurance. And it's considered an emergency procedure. So I had to wait until all the cleanings and insured customers had made their appointments, THEN when they knew where the holes were going to be they would squeeze me in. Some time in January. We go to Dr. K. It was actually seredipidous because Dr. K. is a much nicer and better dentist and his staff are wonderful. It was really the best experience I've ever had at a dentist. So I scheduled Aidan for her first dentist visit in January. We still don't have dental insurance so we have to kind of save up for it. LOL
My shrink tells me he thinks I'm being a tad irresponsible in not addressing my issues with my parents considering the fact that I now have a daughter who will be interacting with them at some point. *sigh* Intellectually, I know he has a point. After they were here to visit last month Aidan came up to me and asked me "Mommy, why do I have a big tummy?" to which I responded, "You don't have a big tummy, you have and Aidan sized tummy. It's just the perfect size for you" She says "Yes I do". John pipes up from the kitchen table "Grandma told her she has a big tummy." Curse that woman. The entire time she was here and ever time she talks to me on the phone she says "You shouldn't get any fatter..." yada yada yada. I think I had almost gotten to the point where I could just kind of block that out but since I heard she was starting it on my four year old daughter, it's bugging me again. And John and I both kind of figured that since Dad didn't start anything until I was 12, we really wouldn't have to worry about that kind of thing for a while and I encouraged Grandma to stay with her the whole time Aidan was home with them while I was at work, but... My shrink pointed out to me that that is just shoving her into a hornets nest, crossing my fingers and hoping for the best. I think because I felt powerless to protect myself, I feel powerless to protect her, somehow. And that just stinks, frankly. Those two people are toxic and they are passing their toxicity on to the next generation. I suppose it's my job to get over this whatever it is that's stopping me from dealing with this stuff so I can stop them from doing this stuff to her. That completely made no sense did it? UGH Well we won't be seeing them for two more years so hopefully I can get myself together by then.
We had an "issue" with Ian's school bus driver a couple weeks ago. She is apparently a reincarnated Nazi or something who gets off on yelling at 6 year old autistic children. Ian was having trouble sitting down when he first got on the bus. The Special Ed teachers were suggesting all kinds of strategies to help. The bus driver, however, thought that if she just yelled at him enough it would fix the problem. So finally Mrs. W., his special ed coordinator wrote an email to me, his teacher, the principal, and the head of the bus drivers saying that they were through working with the bus driver because she wasn't cooperating. They were going to let her write him up and take the whole thing back to PET to arrange alternate transportation. To which I responded with a mildly annoyed letter involving the American's with Disabilities Act and ACLU lawyers, stating that I requested Ian be kept safe around this driver because she obviously has issues and I worried about him being alone with her. After that I got the expected "I had no idea this was going on" letter from the head of the bus drivers. A meeting was arranged with Mrs. W., the principal, the Special Ed director, the bus driver and the head of the bus drivers. Mrs. W. asked if I wanted to attend, but I said as long as she was going to be there I would trust her to handle it. I knew if I was there I would say something stupid to the bus driver and that would only hurt the cause. I told her if this meeting didn't produce the desired results we could schedule another one and I would attend. The main issues Ian was having were the fact that they kept changing his assigned seat (disruption of routine, very bad for Aspies), they currently had him sitting next to two bigger kids who pick on him at his before/after school program (just plain duh!) and his seat was near the middle of the bus where all the noise is concentrated (sensory overload, very bad for Aspies). So at this meeting, they were able to establish the suggestions that Mrs. W. had put to the bus driver at the beginning of the whole mess. Put him in the front seat, next to the window and sit him either alone or with a child we know he gets along with and leave him there for the rest of the year. I can see how Bus Nazi would have trouble with such a complicated and inconvenient accomodation. [/sarcasm]
On a positive note, Ian has started liking to draw. THAT only took 6 years. LOL He mostly uses stencils right now but he does some freehand as well. He is doing amazingly well in school. He has some trouble remembering to hand in his homework, but they're working on that. And he's six for crying out loud. :D He wants to have two friends over for a birthday party in a couple weeks. His birthday is Tuesday but we thought after the holiday might be a better idea. I'm just amazed he wants to invite friends over! Progress is being made.
Aidan is still the same wonderful, unique, intelligent, girly girl. She loves princesses and still wants to marry a prince. Good luck with that one sweetie. She can write her own name! I was pretty gobstopped when I saw that. LOL And she's still wicked tempremental. But I suppose that's just the way she's going to be.
John has been letting them watch Spongebob lately and I just want to go on record as saying I am firmly against this!!! I can just feel their little brains turning to mush everytime I hear them guffawing in front of that tripe. However, I have been outvoted. *grrr*
Work is going well. My boss loves me, and my bosses boss loves me. I hope this one lasts for a while. Last week, my boss was actually talking about advovating for a raise for me. LOL It's a non-profit, I'm not holding my breathe but it's nice that she thinks I deserve one.
BUT we must remember...one day at a time. Things change rapidly around here.
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at 10:31 AM ::
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11:22 AM
